ATTACK TRUCK

I don't think I mentioned this yet, but back in October, I bought a truck. I sold my little jetta and got me a big, bad ass 4X4 truck!! The guy I bought it from was a hard core dirt biker and he had really "pimped out" this truck, giving it huge tires and fancy mags. He also put two very sharp, very pointy prongs on the front bumper I didn't know if they served a purpose, or if they were just put there to look "bad ass." But they did look "bad ass" and I liked it. He left those spikes on the truck when he sold it to me and I pointed them out to my friends with pride. This week those spikes turned on me!!

It's no secret, I have been stupid tired this week. I am still trying to recover from the awesome whirl wind that was wedding week. In fact, I still have yet to catch up on my sleep and several chores are still waiting to be tackled. I still have 2 suitcases to unpack, though yesterday, I managed to find the time and energy to pull my wedding dress out of the front zipper of my suitcase. The morning of Jan.4th, just before we left Sunny Akumal, Marty and I put on our wedding outfits one last time and frolicked on the beach and in the ocean while Mom and Nic did one last, fun, free spirited photo shoot. I then stripped out of my wedding dress, balled it up, tossed it in a plastic bag, zipped it into my suitcase and forgot about it.

Anyway, I still have yet to unpack the suitcases, my overnight bag from my weekend adventures and my truck, from a week of scrambling to get organized. I still have piles and piles of laundry to do and my Christmas decorations are still up!!!! The point is, I have been tired and not really functioning at normal Jeanne/Tazmanian Devil speed. My focus has been clouded my memories of hot sun, sandy beaches and romantic nights.....

So, I parked my truck, after work, in the driveway right infront of the garage doors (it is too big to fit in the garage.) I stumbled out of the driver's seat, slammed the door shut and groggily dragged my exhausted Fun French Teacher Self around the front of the truck. All I could think about was how good collapsing on the couch was gonna feel. I was imagining turning on the fire place (can you believe people actually say "turn on the fire place," oops, that should be another blog...), plopping down on the soft leather, pulling a fuzzy blanket up to my chin and and closing my heavy, heavy eyes, when I was ripped from peaceful thoughts by a sharp pain. The pain was so sharp, I almost cried which took my by surprise. I was in my driveway, how could I be suddenly hurting so badly??? I looked down at my leg, the pain was intense there and noticed my lulu lemon pants, my favorite lulu pants were ripped and blood was running out of the hole. Upon further investigation, I realized that I had walked too closely to my bad ass truck and the sharp prongs (now referred to as "weapons") had snagged my pants and a good chunk of skin!!! The lump that developped over the next few hours could be felt through jeans and the color of the whole area turned to a blueish purple. I ended up having to get a tetnus shot, all because of my own truck!!!!!!

HEY, JEANNE, WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!